What If It's Love: A Small Town Romance (Serendipity Series Book 2) Read online

  “How did he find you?”

  “Social worker who had the misfortune of being assigned my case. I never did repay or thank him for the kindness he showed me when I was such a rebellious and untrusting kid.”

  “I think your life is a testament to how grateful you are for him.”

  “Maybe.” Unfortunately, Merrick didn’t feel like he’d thanked the man he called Dad in the way he should have. Yeah, he’d made something of himself. But he’d never actually said the words. It was where he struggled. Giving voice to feelings was a weakness and people exploited weaknesses.

  Justice shook her head. “It isn't any of my business, Merrick. I'm sorry. That was incredibly rude of me.”

  “You of all people, have a right to ask me about my past. We’ve been friends a long time, and you never pushed. Even now, it was simple conversation. It’s just…I never actually said the words. I talk to him every week, and I still haven’t said thank you.” He reached over and brushed a stray hair from her face. “It seems like certain things should be spoken.”

  She pulled back, casually putting space between them. “Maybe some things should be.”

  “Not all things though?”

  “Don’t you think sometimes the things unspoken are better left that way?” She got up and headed toward the kitchen.

  “Not sure anymore.” He rose from the chair and followed her.

  As they walked through the dining room, he noticed more pictures. One of her snowboarding. “Where was this taken?”

  “Park City. I went with the gang, but when we got up there, Kreed was the only one willing to put his country butt on a board.”

  “And this?” He indicated a picture of her with a snorkel and fins in her hand. The mayor was at her side.

  “That was after graduation. My mom and I talked about going snorkeling in the Cayman Islands. Kaitlyn went with me, and we took some of my mom’s ashes and spread them there. It was a hard trip but a good one at the same time. I want to go back.”

  “You should.” Merrick leaned against the counter, which served as a breakfast bar big enough for two.

  “I will, someday.”

  “Don’t wait, Justice. When you get the urge to go, make it happen. If you need help, there are plenty of people around here who would do whatever you needed so you could go. With the way you bend over backward to help people in this town, they would probably buy your plane ticket.”

  “I know. You’re right. I just…I don’t know. Worry about the shop. The gym. My dad.”

  “Those are excuses.” Merrick knew because he’d done the same thing. But over the last few years, he started realizing he needed the break. The adventure. The moments when he was something other than the fireman, the pizza place owner, or the guy with the troubled past. Justice needed a break from the town. A chance to find her smile again. To reconnect with what made her happy. “All of those things will still be here when you return. You still have to live your life.”

  “I know.” Justice pulled paper plates out of the overhead cabinet. “It’s not like your setup at Southern Charred. You have Quinn. When you leave, your business still runs. If I leave, there is no one who has my back. I mean Dakota and Kelsea are good helpers when I’m in a bind, but running the shop daily? Kelsea has her own business and Dakota is busy at the station on most days.”

  “Just don’t miss out on opportunities to travel and do the things you want to do. Life is short.” Merrick pulled the boxes of Thai food out and placed them on the counter. “That little adventurous side you keep hidden…it will either fuel and inspire you, or it will be a source of regret. The choice is yours.”

  A blush crept into her cheeks. “My adventures don’t compare to free diving or base jumping. And I certainly wouldn’t have the guts to run into a burning building.”

  “You’d be surprised what you are capable of when people’s lives and property are on the line.” Merrick shrugged. “I guess in some ways, it’s a way for me to make up for all the bad I’ve done.”

  “Makes sense.” Justice leaned on the counter, facing off against him. “You want to make good on the auction?”

  “Yes. I think I owe you.”

  “We’re friends. You owe me nothing.” She scooped a bite of the curry in her mouth.

  Merrick saw the little twinkle in her eye, and he half suspected she would start dancing around with joy if she were by herself.

  “We could argue about this all night. Just tell me what’s on your mind.”

  “I want to do something I've never done before.”

  “Which is?” For a moment, he wondered what he’d just subjected himself to, but this was Justice he was talking to. The good girl guys like him wanted to bring home to meet the family.

  “Ding dong ditch. Toilet paper someone's house.” She winked. “Be wild and reckless.”

  He couldn't tell if she was being serious, and almost questioned her but didn't.

  “Kidding. You should see the look of horror on your face!” She straightened, and her face flushed, which made him think maybe she wasn't. “I would love to cliff dive though.”

  “Really?”

  “Yeah. Don't look so shocked.”

  Merrick had never dated anyone who enjoyed any serious outdoor activities. Why he was surprised Justice did after seeing the pictures lining the walls and shelves was beyond him. She seemed to love being outside every chance she got. There were many times he’d seen her out on the lake on her paddleboard. But he'd spotted a canoe and mountain bike in her garage once. It didn’t necessarily mean anything. He’d known women to invest in things because they were trying to impress men. She didn't come off as that kind of girl though. If she had the gear, she probably used it whenever she got the chance. Though how often it happened was questionable. He thought about it for a minute. They had a small bank of rocks where the river fed into the lake and a waterfall. It would be a good place to start. If she enjoyed it, he knew plenty of other places they could go cliff diving.

  “You've never dove off the top of the falls?”

  “Never. To be honest, I'm a little afraid of heights. Which is crazy right? I mean, I’ve done a lot of stuff which could get me killed, but standing on the edge of a cliff people dive off every day terrifies me.”

  “Cliff diving can be arranged. The water is a little cool though.”

  “Yeah. You're probably right.”

  “Well you have some time to think about it. I'm not going anywhere.” They sat in silence for a moment, and he wondered what the terms of the auction were. “How long did you buy me for?”

  “You didn't read the agreement?”

  “To be honest...no.” The evening Kaitlyn shoved the paper across the desk, he’d felt bad knowing how Justice got roped into the gig. “I signed it because I figured you could use the comic relief. Worked out well.”

  “Yeah. I don’t know about comic relief. Your ex making an appearance wasn’t in the cards. But then again, there were a lot of things I didn’t see happening.”

  “Like?” He had his own list of what he hadn’t planned on.

  “The kissing, for one.”

  A blush crept into her cheeks and watching her squirm was kind of endearing.

  “Was it bad?”

  “Only if things get weird.”

  “I don’t see that happening.”

  She tossed her plate in the garbage. “Bella Marcone making an appearance in my shop is another.”

  “To be honest, I didn’t see that one coming either.”

  “She was upset you wouldn’t take her calls or see her. She wanted to have a little heart to heart with me. She believes I’m the only thing standing in her way to reuniting with you.”

  “Honestly, you are a big part of it, but you aren’t the only reason she won’t get what she’s after.”

  “You were going to marry her.”

  “I was.” Merrick thought back on those times and realized he didn’t have a true understanding of what love was. The fi
rst sixteen years of his life he’d pretty much been on his own. Even after the Hudson’s came into his life, he couldn’t grasp the concept of people loving him. Bella didn’t. Not if she was honest with herself. And if he were completely honest, he wasn’t sure he loved her either. She represented a life he didn’t think he could achieve on his own. He was in love with the idea of her and with the idea of being part of the Marcone dynasty.

  “Would you go back?”

  “It’s a chapter of my life I happily closed the door on.”

  “I wouldn’t fault you if you did. Bella is beautiful. I could only imagine what drove her to chase you down here.”

  “I’m good publicity. Quinn doesn’t handle being in the public eye very well. I’m accustomed to it.”

  “From fighting?”

  “In part. What I wasn’t comfortable with, I learned real quick to become comfortable with when I started dating Bella. Marcone’s live for good press and the press loved them.” Merrick thought about the conversation he had with Bella a few days earlier when she’d called him before the fair. “She is here because of an article she read in a magazine. It was piece they did on the restaurant.”

  “You don’t think she loves you?”

  “No. I don’t.” Merrick didn’t like talking about Bella, but he knew it needed to be covered. It was the only way he and Justice could move forward with whatever it was they were doing. “Now we’ve covered that…let’s get back to the auction and my term of servitude.”

  “I could tell you that you were in service to me until the end of time, and you would have no idea if I was lying or not.”

  “Oh, I think it would be a pretty bold-faced lie.”

  She crossed her arms and let her gaze travel over him. Then she broke. The serious look on her face disappeared and she shook her head. “There is no term. I would've donated the money anyway. It goes to a good cause. I was more than happy to use it to help your ex realize she should move on.”

  “Well I think I at least owe you a nice dinner for saving me.” He noted the food spread out on the counter in front of them. “This doesn’t count.”

  He closed the remaining containers of food and moved around the counter, closing the distance between them one container at a time. She put them in the fridge and turned around, practically walking right into him. She looked up at him, a nervousness fueling the air between them. They both moved in the same direction then back. They moved in an awkward attempt to maneuver around one another. She sighed and placed her hand on his chest. Hi breath caught for just a split second, then he smiled and leaned in, reaching behind her to grab the sponge from the edge of the sink. With a wink, he moved out of the way and began to wipe down the counters.

  She placed her hands on her hips and let out a slow breath. “You did that on purpose.”

  “Perhaps.” He returned the sponge to the sink and turned, leaning against the counter. “A simple excuse to get closer.”

  “Huh.” She mirrored his position on the opposite side of the kitchen. “I never took you for a guy who needed excuses.”

  He chuckled. “Need? Not usually. But this isn’t the gym. This is uncharted territory.”

  “My kitchen?”

  “No. What is happening between us.”

  “Oh.” Justice glanced away. Silence enveloped the space between them. It was only a matter of time before it went from comfortable to awkward.

  “I think I should head out.” He didn’t want to go. What he wanted was more time with her.

  “You don’t have to go. We could watch a movie.”

  He looked at her and knew if he stayed, it would be a mistake. “Maybe another night.”

  “Oh.” It was such a simple word but disappointment lingered around it. “Okay.”

  He pushed away from the counter and moved in closer. Watching her squirm a little with every step he took. He placed a gentle kiss against her lips. Then he rested his forehead against hers. “There is nothing I would love more than to cuddle up on the couch and watch a movie with you. Problem is, I don’t trust myself to sit next to you without turning into a hormonal teenager wanting a make out session. So I’m going to go.”

  A nervous giggle escaped her and he could see the level of uncertainty and discomfort in her. It was a very fine line they were walking and if he didn’t handle it right, he worried neither one of them would recover. After another quick kiss, he straightened, threw the last remnants of their dinner in the trash and headed toward the door.

  Once he reached the door, he turned and she tilted her head up slightly to meet his gaze.

  The look in her eyes had changed. A distance that he was familiar with. The wall had come up to protect herself. She leaned against the door. “I don't know what is going on between us, but honestly, I think it's best if we just let things go back to the way they were.”

  “You don't want to take a chance on this being something more?”

  “Says a man who takes risks in every area of his life save one.” She rose up on tiptoes and gently pressed her lips to his cheek. It was sweet and friendly. Not at all what he wanted from her. When she pulled away, she reached behind her and opened the door to let him out.

  “What if it's love?”

  “You don't believe in love, Merrick. And to be honest, I don't know if I do anymore either.” She leaned against the door.

  This was not how he wanted the night to end. He reached up and caressed her cheek. Then he moved in close, every exhale of his breath causing the stray strands of hair to dance against her skin. “What I believe in changes a little bit every day.”

  She shivered, and goosebumps erupted across her skin. “Oh?”

  “Four years, Justice.” He kissed her neck gently. “Four years I’ve been a friend. I would be lying if I said I never thought of the possibility of us. I didn’t act on it though, because we both had our share of disappointment and endured more than any one person should when it comes to relationships and heartache. But I’m not going to sit on the sidelines anymore.”

  “I don’t know…” Her voice trailed off as he pulled the pins from her hair, setting the auburn strands free.

  He kissed along her jawline, then captured her mouth with his. And again, every nerve came to life at her response. No way was he letting the possibility of this go. Not willingly. He pulled back, then placed a chaste kiss on her lips and rested his forehead against hers. When she peered up at him through her lashes, he said, “This is one stepping stone of many that we will take together. See you at the gym tomorrow.”

  Chapter 7

  “What is going on with you?”

  Dakota’s voice snapped Justice back to the present. “Huh?”

  “You are so distracted. Is it your dad?” Dakota’s brow creased with concern.

  “Wrong man.”

  “Oh?” Dakota cleared the cut flower stems and picked leaves off the worktable and threw them in the trash. Justice saw the realization hit her dear friend. “Oh! So. Mr. Hot Lips Hudson is finally getting to you?”

  “He’s trying to wear me down at every turn.”

  “What are you going to do?”

  Justice looked down at the very sad looking corsage in her hand. She pulled the pieces apart and started over. “Nothing. I’m going to do nothing. Things will eventually go back to the way they were.”

  “Really? The way they were? Because that was working out so well for you before.”

  “Yes.” Justice took the floral wire and carefully worked to secure the small blooms into place. “Everything was working out quite well.”

  “It was?”

  “Yes! Why does every question have this underlying note of doubt?” She set the corsage on the table and stared at it. “My life was fine. Then he had to go and get in that stupid line.”

  “And?”

  “Now I don’t know. Everything’s different. Before he was just my friend. A very good looking one. But it never went beyond that.” Justice grabbed the small packaging box and nest
led the corsage safely inside it.

  “So over the years, as your friendship developed, you never once thought there could be more?”

  “As in relationship type more? Of course I’ve thought about it. How could I spend as much time with him as I have and not have it cross my mind? Problem is the potential for heartache. It’s huge.”

  “It is a risk you take in any relationship.” Dakota took the small box and turned to set it in the cooler behind her. “But they are risks worth taking. You can’t hide from life, Justice.”

  “I’m not hiding from life.”

  “You most certainly are.” Dakota leaned across the table. “The girl I knew in high school…she was something to behold. I looked up to her. She was a girl who didn’t take no for an answer, who didn’t let people push her around, and inspired those closest to her to chase after bigger and better things. Then life got the best of her and she let it.”

  “That girl doesn’t exist anymore.”

  “I beg to differ. The essence of that girl is still there. Deep down, it is what draws Merrick to you. Kindred spirits if you will.”

  “I’m not good enough for someone like him.”

  “Most people who find someone who really sets their soul on fire, don’t feel like they are good enough.” Dakota glanced down at her wedding ring. “I know I didn’t. And in many ways, I still don’t believe I am. But the thing is…everyday I get to wake up next to someone who truly loves me. All my crazy irrational bits and all the sane ones too. And I have no doubt that Kreed feels the same way. And you deserve to give yourself the chance to find that.”

  “And if it’s not him?”

  “Then you guys will find your footing again as friends. Maybe not right away, but eventually you will return to this place where you are close again. But I don’t think that’s what worries you. I think what worries you most, is what if he is the one.”

  “Everything good in my life falls apart.” Justice glanced at the picture of her mother that sat on the corner of her desk. The back of the frame was the only thing visible, but she didn’t need to see the image. Every bit of it was etched in her memory.